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MR. DARCY, VAMPYRE

Publishers Weekly’s Calvin Reid couldn’t help himself: he injected a mild note of wonderment into his report about the impending arrival of a new graphic novel: “It had to happen,” he said, continuing: “Following the success of Quirk Book's best-selling transformation of Jane Austen's classic novel Pride and Prejudice into, well, a zombie novel, Ppandzombies Del Rey Books announced plans to turn the result, Seth Grahame-Smith’s Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, into a graphic novel” to be published in 2010. Zombies and vampires festoon the newsstands — and now, the bookstalls. Mr. Darcy, Vampyre, Amanda Gange’s sequel to Pride and Prejudice in which Elizabeth Bennett’s beau/husband reveals his true nature (vampirism is the reason he’s so moody), arrives in early August. Then, still plowing up Jane Austen’s ground, comes Sense and Sensibility and Sea Monsters in which, quoth Carol Memmott in USA Today, Austen’s Colonel Brandon has tentacles growing out of his chin. Coming in December, a pair of Austen enhancements: Darcy’s Hunger: A Vampire Retelling of Jane Austen’s Price and Prejudice by Regina Jeffers and Jane Bites Back by Michael Thomas Ford. And Grange is working on a Pride and Prejudice prequel about Darcy the vampire. Next, I suppose, the graphic novel versions of them all. It is inevitable: writers and publishers are desperate to find things to write about that won’t make some cluster of concerned humanity angry enough to protest and rush, frothing at the mouth, to the barricades with picket signs. The undead, presumably, can’t protest. And vampires? Well, they’re always out for blood anyhow. But why pick on proper little Jane Austen? She’s probably throwing up in her reticule.

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